04 April 2012

*place interesting title here*

I can never come up with anything interesting sounding! Something eye-catching. Lol. Probably cuz there's not much going on right now.

I've just been, well, working. Nice thing though, this coming Sunday, the hub has off work! Which is really frickin' weird because I can't remember the last time he had a Sunday off. Not since he moved to this place in Frederick anyway.

It'll be our first day off together since March 11th. Whew. This "never-having-overlapping-days-off" thing blows. What's the point of working hard and earning more money, if we can never have the marriage/companionship to look forward to? Being with hub makes the rest of my life more bearable and meaningful.

I look at other couples on Facebook or the ladies back home, and I think, man they've got it good. They (seem to, I dunno for sure) see each other more often. They have kid, or having their second kid, they're able to have time together, to be a family. They're "settling down".

Meanwhile, we're f*ckin' rejoicing over the fact that we'll have our first day off together in 27 days. It's a half-way marriage or somethin'. Right now, we see each other about the same amount of time or less than that of when we were dating.

I think that the only people who have it worse possibly than us are where one or both spouses are in the military. Going off on tour for a few months or something. I couldn't do that at all. T__T

I guess I just wonder if we'll both ever be happy. It's been 4 years, and sometimes I feel that we haven't seen much of each other. I think of having a kid and....it seems like a nice thought.

But.

How that work out, seriously? I'd be a single parent essentially. Would the kid even get to see him that much? *I* don't get to see him that much.

Sometimes I toy with the idea that maybe our careers/schedules/lack of finances just aren't conducive to having kids. Maybe it's just not meant for us. A dog or two would be more practical I suppose.

One upside perhaps is that we're never together long enough for us to get on each other's nerves? We're just always longing to see each other. I can't count how many times during the week we say "Miss you" to each other in notes or texts. It's very lonely on both sides.

All in all, these are just "wonderings". They surface every now and again. Who the hell knows what'll happen.

Going to read for a little bit before bed. Night!

3 comments:

222 said...

Is there a reason you stay in the US? Surely your lifestyle would be more pleasant over in Japan.

ローラ said...

It probably would be more pleasant in some ways, yes. But it wouldn't be a logical choice at this point in time, for us, for many reasons.

-chai- said...

That's rough for sure.. me and my ex did the long-distance thing for the majority of our 4-year relationship, so i feel where you're coming from. Do you think your hub will be looking into a job at another restaurant? If so hopefully he can find a place with hours that match up a little better with your hours so you can see each other more. :( I hope you can enjoy your Sunday together